The Columnist Manifesto

These were actually said this morning.

1) At the end of yoga class this morning, the yoga instructor tells us that he was watching an episode of Jeopardy recently and was surprised to see that one of the contestants was named Iyengar. It's not a common name in the U.S., and of course it put him in mind of B.K.S. Iyengar, who is one of the most influential yogis on the contemporary practice of yoga in the U.S. This dialogue ensued:

Random yoga student: Did "Iyengar" win?

Yoga teacher: Actually, he came in third.

Oscar: That's surprising -- I'd think that a yogi would be particularly good at putting the answer in the form of a question.

2) Walking home from yoga, B and I bump into a neighbor whose wife is up north deer hunting. (You need to know for this story that B is a lawyer.) The neighbor tells us that he and his wife have learned how to butcher the deer right in their own home and will get a several month supply of venison out of the kill his wife brings home.

B: I want us to learn how to do that. Can we tag along next year? That's one of those skills that's probably good to have.

Neighbor: You mean for the post-nuclear apocalypse?

B: Yeah. I figure we already have the law thing covered.

Advantage: B.