The Columnist Manifesto

In honor of the Winter Olympics, a disproportionate number of this week's verifictionary entries involved sounds made while falling down:

warren p.k.
wjaxlq -- woops, axle, qu.. (the mental mutterings of an olympic ice skater failing in an attempt at a double-quad axle combination)

shlmh -- the sound a skier makes after crossing the finish line and now swirling to a stop

Sleep Goblin :
zpahgq (zuh-'pahk): an expletive used when you've fallen down, as the initial syllable, zuh, comes as the air leaves you with the thud, and is quickly followed by pahk! as the pain fills your bottom.

Wendy
gahnmf (GAH - umph): The noise one makes when slipping on ice and falling on one's butt.

and other Olympiana:

warren p.k.
jvwymq == junior varsity women's curling team

snszmovc == snooze moves (those boringly repetitive compulsory ice dance moves in the olympics, when performed by skaters from slovakia, the czech republic or any other balkans country in need of an emergency vowel drop)

trkdtuqx -- track and duck, the recommended motion for anyone going quail hunting with the vice president

in other recurring themes:

Wizards, Warlocks and Sci-fi-biotech:

janelle renée
raymr (ray-mer)- the latest success in cross species breeding technology: a stingray-mermaid hybrid.

wzflks (was-folks)-- (1) The no longer cool folks; (2) (wiz flicks)-- The best selling educational DVD series of 2006: Everything you need to know to become a wizard!

wrhliqh: (wer-lick, the "h" is silent) a warlock who practices out in the sticks


Wendy
zgdofec (zy-go-do-fek) the effect zygotes have on online message boards, especially during discussions about abortion rights.

Honorable Mentions

Sara
abpsmcjk: absinthe and milk

hkiwqu: a line of people waiting in Hong Kong

Tom Bozzo
piyux - (1) The baby talk version of the 'math is boring, hard, and useless' column by Richard Cohen of the Washington Post; (2) utterance of insane dessert haters.

craig kaye
bwdrtwb - "budoir tub" - a small used to clean one's self found in a budoir

Oscar Madison
garqylrx: (gar-gyle RX) -- a prescription medication taken by gargling and spitting out, prescribed to cure the compulsion to wear argyle socks or sweaters.

kqmraum -- (KQM-raum): the motivation for expansionist, consolidation and takeover policies in the broadcasting industry; lebensraum ("living space") for west coast radio TV and stations.

Runners Up

Wendy
eyjsj (eye-jizz): the crusty stuff in the corner of one's eye that is often found upon awakening.

warren p.k.
snszmovc == snooze moves (see above)

and the Winner is:

Neel Mehta
gqaqtd (GQ-act-ed): Wore a sharp suit to pose for some imaginary magazine cover photographer for reasons beyond metrosexuality.

And a special "picto-verifictionary" prize to Majorsteel for creating a picture of his last week's Grand Prix winning word.